Because I do not bring home a paycheck ...

Friday, September 14, 2007 I have wanted to be a SAHM ever since the moment that I had to drop Breeanna off at daycare when she was 6 weeks old for the first time and return back to work. It was a really hard moment and I cried all morning. Needless to say, I cried the day I dropped off Harleigh and the day that I dropped Eythen and retuned back to work after giving birth to them. As a Mom you feel like you are "missing out" on their lives. I missed Breeanna's first steps when she was at daycare. I was not there for Harleigh one day, so she layed by the door at daycare and cried for me . I had to take Eythen back to daycare the day after he had tubes put in his ears because I could not miss anymore work. I knew my kids were being loved and cared for while I was at work, but I was suspose to be the one loving and caring for them. ME!!! But like MANY other families, both Clint and I had to work to pay the bills. But I still so badly wanted to be home with them . . . reading to them, playing games with them, going to the park, teaching them while they taught me, etc. I finally got the chance to be a SAHM when we picked up our family and moved to the outskirts of Lawrence. I have never been more happy about the chance I got. But yet, it seems at times . . . others do not feel as if SAHM's have a purpose in this world. If you are not bringing home a paycheck . . . then what exactly are you doing? Last night, Clint and I were applying with a mortgage agency to refiance our home loan. I sat there and listened to Clint as he talked to the lady on the other end of the phone. She asked his profession, income, and then social security number. She then asked what I did. . . . but that was the end of the conversation on my behalf. Once Clint said that I was a Stay at Home Mom . . . she moved onto another question. She did not even need my social security number. I was nearly in tears over the subject. Does it make me worthless to society because I do not get "paid" for ALL the work I do? What about ALL the hours that I put towards my family and I do not get a single complimate, thankyou or gratification from a single sole. .. does society care about that??? Are others thinking that SAHM's are lazy, worthless, no ambition in life and uneducated? Well, I got news for those people out there. I am an educated woman that has a degree! I went to college and take great pride in the fact that I am placing my family first and career second. But does society care? I keep my family going like a well oiled machine. I am the glue that keeps the pieces of the puzzle together. I am the one that kisses the boo-boo's and becomes a instant doctor. I am the one that drives them to and from places as if I had the word "Taxi" on the side of my SUV. I am able to get groceries for a week in 20 minutes . . . because that is all the time I have. I am a banker that keeps the secret stash of money for the days when the kids beg for ice cream. I am the one that is a chef and cooks for the picky eaters in the famiy. I am the physologist when one of my kids had someone be mean to them. I am a referre when a fight breaks out among the group. I take great pride in the term "Soccer Mom". I am even in the PTO of my childrens school. I would not be complete if I did not have someone calling me Mommy, Mom, or Momma. I am a SAHM who does not get a paycheck! But does that make me "somebody" in society???