Tuesday, September 7, 2010

3,637 days ...

I have been married to Clint for 9 years ... 11 months ... 2 weeks ... and 3,637 days.  But who's counting?!?!?!

Along Clint's and my married path ... we have had our bumps in the road.  We have also had our fair share of pot holes, detours, dead ends, destination re-routing, road construction, blinking yellow lights ... that you creep through the intersection with because you are not sure if it is "really your turn yet", cars getting stuck in mud, bridges being destroyed, maps flying out the window, broken GPS, 4 way stop signs, road blocks and keys getting locked in the car type of marriage moments.

Come on now.  Admit it.  Every marriage goes through it's "battles" ... but it is when you wave that white flag ... after the National Guards have been called in ... what matters the most.  If you are smiling and holding hands ... that is a good sign!  And yes ... the National Guards, Army, Navy, Fire Station, Police Station, Smokey the Bear, Marines, Principal of the School and Sponge Bob Square Pants have been called in to help solve some "battles" along the way in these past 10 years that I have been married to Clint.

So ... due to the factor that I have "almost officially" been married for a DECADE ... I think that makes me an expert on marriage.  Yep ... a freaking expert!  In fact ... I think I have a PHD in marriage!  Why are you laughing???

OK ... OK ... OK!!!  So I can not really write the owners maual to being married ... but I could at least write a chapter in it.  Ummm ... Ok ... maybe not a chapter.  But ... well ... shit!  Who am I kidding ... I do not think Clint or I have ever even opened up and skimmed a few pages of the owners manual to a marriage. Maybe I should make that our goal for the next 10 years ... at least read the cliff notes on how to be married.

I can honestly say ... that I love that man more today ... than the day that I walked down the isle with my Dad by my side ... smiling from ear to ear ... in the one and only wedding dress that I tried on and bought the same day ... while my feet were killing me because of my stupid shoes ... as friends and family joined us on September 23rd in 2000 to watch us say I Do.  Oh who am I kidding ... our friends were there for the beer that was gonna be served at the reception.  Party oh dudes!

So ... after nearly a decade of being Mrs. Moore ... here are a few things that I have learned along the way.

"Wife" ... really means "maid".  Not sure why ... but it does.  Trust me.

Always remember this important rule to a happy marriage: 
Good things come to those who listen to their wives. 
This IS a proven fact!

When I am an old lady, I want to sit on a porch swing with Clint ... holding hands, sipping Dr.Pepper and swatting mosquitos.

A husband is the only one of your chldren that does not grow up and move away.

Love brought Clint and I together as husband and wife ... and gave us a bestfriend for life.

Clint ... here is a little FYI.  If you wanna know the best foreplay and biggest turn-on for me.
Well, here it is ... do some housework and laundry every once in awhile.

I really hope that if I come back as a man ... I get a wife that is as good as my husband's.

The secret to love is learning how to be disfunctional ... perfectly ... together.

So many acts and expressions of love go unnoticed and unfelt ... because we simply get used to them.

Rules for a successful Marriage.
1. The wife is always right.
2. In the event that the wife is wrong ... please refer to rule #1.

There are days ... that I can not wait for the "Cash for Husbands" program to go in to effect.

The rooster may rule the roost, but the hen rules the rooster.

Never under estimate the power of a woman ... once she has had enough

Remember that you can still love your spouse ... even on the days that you do not like them very well.

Forget my knight in shining armor. I will take a plumber in a truck any day.

From the words of Elle Woods on the Legally Blonde movie.
Exercise gives you endorphine, endorphins make you happy ... and happy people just do not kill thier husbands

You only need to love your husband twice in your lifetime.  Now and forever.

Who has a husband that loves them even during the worst PMS?  I Do!  I Do!  Eat your heart out ladies!

You know you married the right man ... when you go to day-dream ... and your husband is the guy that pops into your head.  Yes Clint ... you pop into my daydreams!  *smile*

Sometimes I wonder how I got such a great husband ... then today I realized that it is because I am such an awesome wife.

Sometimes there are religious issues in our marriage.  Clint thinks he is God ... and I do not.

It will cross your mind at one point or another ... to put your husband up for bid on ebay.

Women just need to hear those 3 little words ... Here's. My. Wallet.

Marriage does not guarantee that you will be together forever.  It is only a piece of paper.  It takes love understanding and friendship to make a relationship last

How is it that Clint can read blue prints and build an entire house ... but he can not seem to put his dirty dishes in the sink?

Happy wife means happy life. Your choice gentleman.

My husband wears the pants in the family ... but I control the zipper.

Here is to "almost nearly" ten years of being husband and wife, Clinton.  You are my bestfriend.  My partner in this game called life.  My world would be an upside down mess without you in it.  Thanks for being you ... and loving me.


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