Stupid Tylenol PM ...

* Take Tylenol PM at 8:30 in hopes of falling asleep and declaring my "territory" in our bed before my husband does

* Crawl into bed at 10:30

* Husband crawls into bed at 11:00

* Still wake at 11:00 when husband crawls into bed

* Husband gives me good night kiss

* Wondering why the Tylenol PM has not kicked in yet

* Realizing that if I do not fall asleep in the next 15 minutes ... I will be listening to my husband saw logs

* To late

* Husband sawing logs

* Still awake at 11:30

* Husband still sawing logs

* Slightly shove husband in hopes of getting him to stop snoring

* Husbands body does not even move

* Snoring gets louder

* Wondering why this darn Tylenol PM is STILL not working

* Husband snoring gets louder

* Shove husband a bit harder than the last time in hopes of getting him  to stop snoring

* Husbands body moves more than I expected it to

* CRAP!  I hope he does not fall off the bed from that shove

* Husband stops snoring

* Husband starts snoring again

* STUPID Tylenol PM makers

* Debate with myself on getting up and emailing Tylenol PM to tell them off

* 12:00 and husband is snoring so loud I think the pictures on the wall just shook

* Shove husband even harder than the last time in hopes of getting him to stop snoring

* Husbands body nearly rolls completely over from the shove

* Secretly hoping he falls off the bed

* Does not phase husband

* Husband is still snoring

* F^#$ing Tylenol PM

* Scream husbands name a bit louder than I planned on

* Husband mumbles "What?"

* Pretend like I am asleep

* Husband is snoring ... again

* 12:30 I am thinking of sueing Tylenol PM

* Wait ... here that?!?!?

* Husband stopped snoring

* Relieved husband stopped snoring because I really did not wanna have to put a pillow over his face

* Snuggle into a comfy spot in my bed

* Crap!  I do not wanna lay this way.  I wanna roll over.

* Husband still not snoring

* Roll over ever so carefully in hopes of not waking the bear

* Bad things happen if you wake the bear

* Shit!  I woke the bear

* Husband is sawing logs ... again

* Certain I took the only two Tylenol PM's in the bottle that do not work

*insert snore here* ...

Last. Night. My. Husband. Snored.

Shit ... I am honestly surprised that the cops did not ticket him for disturbing the peace.

So ... last night after kicking, shoving, pushing, elbowing and screaming "CLINT" ...

For the 847th ...

So as I layed in bed ... I began to think of other scenerios that would be a wee-bit more fun than what I was experiencing at that exact moment ...

Because....

Personally ...

Staring at the red numbers on the alarm clock flashing 1:32 am back at me ...

While grasping the pillow next to me ...

Trying to refrain myself from smacking Clint as hard as I could ...

Was not really at the top of my "list" ...

*  being the sole adult in Chuck E Cheese on a Saturday afternoon

*  suddenly realizing I am out of wine ... and the liquor stores are closed.

*  stepping on a Polly Pocket in the middle of the night

*  laying in a bed full of legos

*  living in an iglo without warm gloves

*  at my yearly GYNO appointment

*  being at a haunted house ... alone

*  being locked in a jail cell with the neighborhood pervert
    (Laura ... I KNOW you are laughing at this very moment!!!)

*  checking into a motel and the only room available is one that has stains on the sheets

*  having birds fly at me
      (Terrified. Of. Birds)

*  being in a large body of water and somebody screams "SHARK"

*  meeting Sherron Collins for the first time ... while having lip stick stuck on my teeth

*  realizing that there really is a boogie man under my bed

*  cleaning the kitty litter box

*  watching "Ground Hog Day" on a continous loop

*  mowing the lawn with my teeth

*  at a Star Trek convention

*  having a root canal done

*  ... with no pain killers

*  watching the NFL draft

*  being "that lady" that falls on the treadmill at the gym and everyone stares, points, laughes and talks about it for years to come

*  eating cabbage

*  laying in yellow snow

*  getting a tattoo that says "Enter here"

*  being the sole person on the dance floor with no rhythm ... but certain I am the only one that can bust a move

*  watching every episode of Beevis and Butthead ... start to finish

*  being woke up after FINALLY falling asleep by my son telling me that his cheek hurts.
     (True!  He woke me up to tell me his cheek hurt.  *sigh*  BUT ... I saw this as "my chance" to finally get some sleep.  So I woke Clint up ... and informed him that Eythen was not feeling well and needed to sleep with his Mommy.  I am 97% sure Clint was not awake ... or coherient to what was being said ... but he got up ... grabbed his pillow ... and went to go sleep in another room.)

*  looking at the alarm clock realizing I only have 1 1/2 more hours till my stupid annoying pain in the butt alarm clock goes off.
    (*yawn*)

You click on the link below and vote for my blog ... while I go and take a well deserved nap.